Why Personae?

People put on a mask to hide who they truly are from the world. However, why do they even do this? Why not "simply" be themselves? I am not a professional psychologist digging deep into the human mind. I am just a teenager who has observed herself and her fellow humans. However, I have seen two main reasons that may be the cause, at least in my life, maybe in yours too!

Persecution

People - of all ages - are teased in various ways for being different. Teasing has seemingly been categorized as a stage people go through during adolescence. However, adults are teased as well, just in a different way. It might be a raised eyebrow, a snide comment, being ignored, laughed at, denied taken seriously, or patronized.

No matter how confident the individual this kind of persecution hurts. If the teasing is built upon each other it can become damaging. The more the person receives it the more they believe the persecution is justified or if they don't believe it, they get tried of receiving it. Thus, they will try to change their life to become someone who doesn't deserve the teasing.Twisting their personality into something it's not.

Acceptance

This goes hand-in-hand with the previous section. However, even the people who aren't teased crave to be accepted. It isn't enough to be without negative attention, it always feels nice when people invite us into their circle of friends. Sometimes that feeling seems worth giving up who you are.

 

There are situations in particular that intensify both of these reasons. Perhaps, you can think of some yourself. However, both of these reasons aren't worth trying to live a fake life.

I tried to only be myself in private settings and put on a show when out in public. Not only did I feel like a fraud, but I wasn't able to find people who I could relate to. Understandably! How could I relate to anyone when they didn't know who I really was?  I also kept the people I did relate to at a distance, not letting them see too much  of how I really was for fear they would reject me, like so many people before them. It's an incredibly stressful and lonely life.

However, so many people live this life! And it's hard to break out of it once you are in it. Most likely you won't be able to realize the different lives you live and just "snap out of it." If you can...let me know your secret!! 

I have found that taking it one step at a time helps. When something comes up and you have an urge to talk about your secret hobby, talk about it. The first times your friends see this new side of you will be extremely awkward. I'm not gonna lie. You will most certainly get the raised eyebrow...at least. But, remember why  you are breaking out of the mask. You are doing it so that you can connected with those who can relate to the real you! So you can be accepted by those who you "click" with! Notice how one of the reasons for having  a persona can also  be a reason why not to have a persona?

A great tip I found to use when slowly showing the world my personality was not to think about being myself all at once. This is a horribly overwhelming feeling. But, think about it in individual instances. "Right now I want to tell someone about my list of favorite words. They might think I'm really weird. *insert deep breath* But, it won't be that bad to be thought weird in this one instance." And take the plunge!

Try it out: take a step today that shows the world your personality. It may be easier to do this with a close friend, or maybe a complete stranger! Either way, give it a try. It may be awkward, but also extremely refreshing. 

I would love to hear about your adventures in your real lives! Please comment below :)